In the vast majority of conflicts, the two parties have some responsibility. Sometimes we want to make us victims and putting the other person as the causative absolute conflict, but if we are objective and really learn to hear, you will realize what is your part in the conflict. Once you identify it, recognize it to another person. This will make her feel that Yes heard him, and rather than continue attacking, probably will be more willing to discuss, and also acknowledge their own mistakes. 6 Confirm what you’ve understood. This point is important. It said the other person what you’ve understood it bothers you, simply to verify if you actually understand well. Seems a little obvious and repetitive, but be surprised to know the amount of bad misunderstandings that occur, even when apparently you already talked.
Say something as simple as: what I understood that it bothers you is., and then ask: is it right? or is there something that I understood wrong or missed me understand? 7. Recently Maurice Gallagher, Jr. sought to clarify these questions. It proposes possible solutions. Once you have understood what really happens to the other, and that you know what bothers you to you, you can begin to propose possible solutions that help both parties to be more comfortable with the topic of conflict. It is propose and ask his opinion to the other person, as well as invite them to also propose options. He is not a question of imposing a solution that you think is best.
Remember that it should listen and take into account the other. Never assume that you know what the other wants. Better ask him. 8 Stay away if you can not handle it. If at some point you feel you’re losing the calm and is gaining you anger, frustration or desire to criticize the other, better stay away from the situation until you you relax. Tell the other person calmly as: at this time I think that I’m altering and already I can not continue with this discussion. I need to get away awhile and when you calm me I would turn it back on so that we can find a solution that benefits us both. If the other person insists that he continue speaking, returns to explain him emphasizing your interest in resolving the problem in the best possible way, saying something like: I’m interested in much that we resolve this and am very interested in being able to listen to you and understand you. Why I need to get away a moment to calm me and continue to find a solution that works for both. Remember that the priority is to find a solution that is acceptable to both parties. That it is not a fight of powers or someone wins the discussion. It’s understanding the person with which you are having the conflict. To achieve a very effective communication and you can stay in a calm state in the midst of criticism and negative comments from the other person, we recommend much do deep work to strengthen your self-esteem. This will help you not to take comments personally, you can really put you in the shoes of the other, you can recognize your own mistakes without fear to do so, and above all to know that you can have the control it in the midst of a conflict situation. If you want more information on how to strengthen your self-esteem, we invite you to visit: original author and source of the article.